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It’s a small comfort to know that if you end up venturing into a date that’s a total waste of time, a hilarious mismatch, or ends horrifically, you’ll automatically be the most interesting person at brunch the next weekend.

And to let you know that you’re not alone out there, here are a few terrible (read: entertaining as hell) tales from some real women who spilled the gory details of funniest and weirdest first dates.

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The reality distortion field, made famous by Steve Jobs’ biographer Walter Isaacson, is a personal intensity and vision so powerful it bends people to your will, convincing them of a project’s higher purpose.

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Being divorced for several years, I have tried my hand at online dating, experimenting with a number of different sites, and I know from experience that for someone new to the process, it can be rather intimidating and confusing.